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srisure
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Joined: 30 Aug 2005
Posts: 17

PostPosted: Tue Sep 27, 2005 4:23 am Reply with quoteBack to top

This is just for laugh!


STUPID QUESTIONS AND SMART ANSWERS



BOY : May I hold your hand?

GIRL : No thanks, it isn't heavy.



GIRL : Say you love me! Say you love me!

BOY : You love me...



GIRL : If we become engaged will you give me a ring??

BOY : Sure, what's your phone number??



GIRL : I think the poorest people are the happiest.

BOY : Then marry me and we'll be the happiest couple



GIRL : Darling, I want to dance like this forever.

BOY : Don't you ever want to improve??



BOY : I love you and I could die for you!

GIRL : How soon??



BOY : I would go to the end of the world for you!

GIRL : Yes, but would you stay there??


WIFE : You tell a man something, it goes in one ear and

comes out of the other.


HUSBAND : You tell a woman something: It goes in both

ears and comes out of the mouth.


shree...







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joghee
Starter


Joined: 29 Nov 2004
Posts: 2

PostPosted: Sun Oct 23, 2005 4:28 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

more jokes please
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navia
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Joined: 23 Jun 2004
Posts: 5

PostPosted: Tue Nov 08, 2005 9:56 am Reply with quoteBack to top

Accidental Accident Reports - What a Little Grammar Mistake Can Do.....

Coming home I drove into the wrong house and collided with a tree I don't have.

The other car collided with mine without giving warning of its intent.

I collided with a stationary truck coming the other way.

In my attempt to kill a fly, I drove into a telephone pole.

I had been shopping for plants all day and was on my way home. As I reached an intersection, a hedge sprang up, obscuring my vision and I did not see the other car.

I had been driving for forty years when I fell asleep at the wheel and had an accident.

I was on my way to the doctor with rear end trouble when my universal joint gave way causing me to have an accident.

My car was legally parked as it backed into the other vehicle.

As I approached the intersection a sign suddenly appeared in a place where no sign had ever appeared before, making me unable to avoid the accident.

I told the police I was not injured, but upon removing my hair, I found that I had a fractured skull.

I was sure the old fellow would never make it to the other side of the road when I struck him.

I saw a slow-moving, sad-faced old gentleman as he bounced off the hood of my car.

The indirect cause of the accident was a little guy in a small car with a big mouth.

I was thrown from my car as it left the road, and was later found in a ditch by some stray cows.

A pedestrian hit me and went under my car.

I thought my window was down, but I found out it was up when I put my head through it.

To avoid hitting the bumper of the car in front, I struck the pedestrian.

The guy was all over the road. I had to swerve a number of times before I hit him.

The pedestrian had no idea which way to run, so I ran over him.

An invisible car came out of nowhere, struck my car and vanished.

A truck backed through my windshield into my wife's face.

I pulled away from the side of the road, glanced at my mother-in-law, and headed over the embankment.
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bala_yb
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Joined: 05 Sep 2004
Posts: 9

PostPosted: Mon Nov 14, 2005 8:59 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

"You are in trouble"

An evil Atheist explorer in the deepest Amazon suddenly finds himself surrounded by a bloodthirsty group of natives. Upon surveying the situation, he says quietly to himself "Oh God, I'm screwed!"
There is a ray of light from heaven and a voice booms out: "No, you are NOT screwed. Pick up that stone at your feet and bash in the head of the chief standing in front of you."
So the explorer picks up the stone and proceeds to bash the living heck out of the chief.
As he stands above the lifeless body, breathing heavily and surrounded by 100 natives with a look of shock on their faces, Gods voice booms out again: "Okay ..... NOW you're screwed."

"Marriage"

Married life is full of excitement and frustration:
* In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens.
* In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens.
* In the third year, they both speak and the neighbors listen.

A happy marriage is a matter of giving and taking; the husband gives and the wife takes.

Son: How much does it cost to get married, Dad?
Father: I don't know son, I'm still paying for it.

Son: Is it true? Dad, I heard that in ancient China, a man doesn't know his wife until he marries.
Father: That happens everywhere, son, everywhere!

They say when a man holds a woman's hand before marriage, it is love; after marriage, it is self-defense.

There was this lover who said that he would go through hell for her. They got married, and now he is going through hell.

Marriage is like a mousetrap. Those on the outside are trying to get in. Those on the inside are trying to get out.

My wife has a split personality, and I hate both of them.

_________________
bala pramoth
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